Birth

The pictures in the International Association of Professional Birth Photographers Image of the Year Competition were disturbing, but not for the reason you might think.

Yes, you can see naked lady parts and babies covered in blood and goop -- but vaginas and body fluids are all part of childbirth, so that wasn't what bothered me. It was seeing all the mothers and fathers working as active partners in labor and delivery.

The couple kissing in the tub and cradling their fresh newborn. The sheer joy and relief and amazement in the mother's face as she holds her baby before anyone else does. The still messy baby burrowing into his mother's chest. The father looking on in awe at the power of the life arriving in front of his eyes.

I didn't get any of those moments.

I know I'm supposed to be grateful that my children were born healthy and beautiful, that we had great medical care, that everything turned out fine. But I'm still sad sometimes about having two c-sections.

And then I saw the photo that stopped me in my tracks. It was so unexpected that I had to turn to my husband. "I need to ask you a really strange question: is that a stomach? Because I don't think it could be a vagina."

It's photo #73. I'll give you a minute to go look, although my squeamish friends might want to glance quickly.

Turns out it's the view that I never saw when I was flat on the operating table -- the cesarean incision pushed apart as the doctor's hands pull and tug and wrestle a baby out into the world. My husband recognized it because (despite instructions to keep his seat next to my head) he had peeked over the screen when we were in the operating room.

Seeing that moment captured on my screen was mesmerizing. A little terrifying to look at, and yet incredible to see that my body could do that. Even when I was flat on my back, staring at the ceiling and numb from the ribs down, I wasn't passive. My body allowed a doctor to pull a baby -- my baby -- into the world to breathe. And then that same body somehow unbelievably healed itself over time (okay, a lot of time) to do it all over again.

I think I'll still get that twinge when I see a Hollywood birth moment that seems so magical and natural. But at least for now, I'm going to hold photo #73 in my head and remember how my husband and I worked together in the birth of our beauties.

The Best Hashtag You've Ever Seen

Have you had a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day?

Too many meetings bringing you down? Kid chaos wearing you out? Messy house ruining your view?

You could try a glass of wine to take the edge off. Or maybe go for a run to burn off some stress. Or even just scoop a loved one into a big hug to make you feel okay again.

But sometimes you need a faster, simpler pick-me-up to turn that frown upside down.

And here's where I'm going to change your world in three easy steps:

1. Get your phone or tablet.
2. Go to Instagram.
3. Search for #vivioftheday. 

Here's one sample of the gorgeousness there for you:

Those cheeks, those lashes, those pouty lips, and (did I mention) those CHEEKS! How can you NOT smile when you see that face?! I'm seriously considering making myself a set of cereal bowls with these photos just so I can start my day off right (you might prefer a coffee mug set, but I don't drink coffee).

Now for those of you not paying close attention, I should clarify that this is not my child. This round loveliness belongs to my sweet beach friend, who kindly agreed to hashtag photos of her daughter Vivi so that I could find them quickly when I needed a smile. I mean, my own kids are cute, but they're all long and lean now -- it's just not the same.

So there you have it. Wherever you are, whatever the time of day or night, a smile awaits you at #vivioftheday.

You're welcome.

Friday's 5: Things I Learned on Vacation

We spent last week at the beach. It was glorious -- even with one rainy day and two cloudy days. I won't bore you with the details of drip castles and sunscreen and sand in the bath tub and trying to force Junius to let me take his picture. But I will share with you five random things I learned while at the beach.

1. Good books are even better with cocktails. Before I left for the beach, a friend recommended that I bring a copy of Rules of Civility by Amor Towles. And she suggested that I enjoy a mai tai along with it. Spot on, with both recommendations -- although I'd add a good gin & tonic to the beverage list. As a result, I've decided that all literary selections should come with a drink menu.

2. Some women shave their faces. Not because of a hair issue, but to slough off dead skin cells in order to look younger. And by "some women" I mean someone other than me who may or may not be one of my friends at the beach. I'm not a dermatologist, I haven't tried this, and I'm not making this up -- I'm just sharing. And no, I don't have a picture for this one.

3. Beach olympics are perfect on a cloudy day. You'll be totally jealous when I tell you this, but one of our friends organized "olympic events" including sack races, hula hooping and water balloon tosses -- complete with a hand-stitched olympic flag and "Chariots of Fire" playing in the background. There were also olympic ring tattoos and gold medals for everyone. See? Jealous, right?

4. Dress appropriately for the battleship tour. They don't tell you this on the website for the USS North Carolina, so I'm going to give you the straight truth. We stopped in Wilmington on our way home to tour the WWII battleship. Being an actual battleship, it's very interesting, seriously enormous and crazy hot (no air conditioning) -- all of which they mention on the site. What they don't tell you is that you SHOULD NOT WEAR A SKIRT. My above-the-knee swingy knit skirt was great for the temperatures, but not so smart for climbing up and down the dozens of ladders all over the ship while strangers stand below. Now you know.

5. Popsicles are for breakfast. Or at least they are on check-out day. In year's past, I've always ended up throwing the leftover popsicles in the trash -- not like they're going to survive the trip home in the cooler. This year I was awarded Rock Star Mom status when I handed my kids popsicles and paper towels and sent them out on the deck at 9 a.m. while we packed up the house.

Now it's your turn. What random knowledge have you acquired this summer? Share with us so that all may know...

Instagram Smiles: The True Story Behind the Photo

Instagram is rapidly becoming one of my favorite social networks.

It's a quick, fun glimpse into the lives of my friends (both those I know in person and those I know only online) without all the extra baggage that comes with Facebook -- but it also posts to Facebook, so my friends who aren't on Instagram can still participate.

Plus it's a fun way to pretend that I have some sort of photography skill, which at least keeps me entertained even if no one else is paying attention.

Here's a photo I posted recently on Instagram:

We were in the convertible with the top down -- my husband was driving, so I had the luxury of taking silly photos with my kids. In online responses to the photo, I got comments like "I love your happy children" and lots of "likes."

But in the interest of full disclosure, I must confess that the real scene was not so happy. Here's what I didn't post on Instagram from the same ride home:

That's Junius banging his enormous hard head into his sister's equally enormous hard head, causing her to shriek dramatically in (presumably fake) pain.

So I fussed at him for "hurting" her and he proceeded to pout, duck down and hide behind my seat. I took about four photos like this while I tried to coax him back out again. He mostly moaned, groaned, whined and complained. Notice that Pippi is now only too happy to lean in and smile.

Then he finally sat back up in his seat, but refused to smile or look at me. The two of them took turns (hey -- at least they're sharing, right?) pushing and shoving against each other -- a dramatic re-enactment of the irresistible force paradox.

Eventually he gave up (she's younger, but I think her head is actually bigger), sat back and glared at me. In this photo it almost looks like he wants to smile, but I assure you he did not. As for her? Well, her favorite shtick is to be the opposite of him -- the grumpier he gets, the sillier she becomes.

Nothing like a 6-year-old grouch to take all the sunshine out of driving home with the top down.

For more stylish photos -- including one of my "dessert" cereal from last night -- you can find me on Instagram (and Twitter) @convertiblelife. This post was nudged by my friend Ms. S and by Mama Kat's Writing Prompts.

Say Cheese

A year ago, you saw what happens when Pippi takes the camera. This year, she's focusing more on herself than the house.

There's no profound message here. Those expressions just made me laugh -- plus the close, chin-multiplying angle she gets by having preschooler arms.

Happy New Year! Hope 2012 is bringing smiles.

.

Capture the Everyday: Sign of Fall

This is from last year. But I love it too much not to share it.

We were walking home from the bus stop and he was just neck deep before I could even stop him. The sheer bliss on his face actually made me forget (for a moment) about the laundry and the bath that would be required later.

Capture the Everyday is about getting you to capture those everyday moments in your life! Each Tuesday, Melissa at Adventuroo will issue a simple challenge to capture something that’s a part of your daily life. You can post just a picture or add some words to go along with it. You’ll have a week to get it done and then she’ll issue another. It’s a quick, easy way to start capturing those little parts of life we sometimes take for granted.

Capture the Everyday: Halloween Close-Up

Halloween got rained out at our house tonight.

Thankfully, our kids are young enough that they didn't seem to care. Plus, they'd already had a neighborhood costume parade on Sunday (complete with pinata) and trick-or-treating around Daddy's office on Monday afternoon. So they're not exactly starved for candy.

We hit a couple of milestones for Halloween this year. For Junius, it was his first year dressed as something in a full face mask and carrying a weapon (Anakin Skywalker). Wearing the full mask was really creepy -- even though it was just a hard plastic face -- because it made him look so stern and angry. That's not his normal look.

And for Pippi, I suspect this may have been my last year for enjoying her in a non-princess-based costume. The allure of the tiara is strong. But it turns out that the ears were a bigger draw for her this year.

In case you can't tell from the close-up, that's her Olivia costume. I love that she picked that one -- over Strawberry Shortcake and Cinderella -- because it suits her personality oh-so well. Olivia also comes with happy memories for me because I bought a hardback copy of Ian Falconer's original book in French when we were in Paris more than 10 years ago. At the time, I had no idea it was an American story and soon-to-be Nick Jr television show.

Oh, and in case you're wondering, that's a Halloween kazoo in her mouth. You just never know what sort of treats they'll be handing out at Daddy's office.

Capture the Everyday is about getting you to capture those everyday moments in your life! Each Tuesday, Melissa at Adventuroo will issue a simple challenge to capture something that’s a part of your daily life. You can post just a picture or add some words to go along with it. You’ll have a week to get it done and then she’ll issue another. It’s a quick, easy way to start capturing those little parts of life we sometimes take for granted.

Friday’s 5: Take Your Lovey to Work Day

We all stay really busy around our house. Like most families, we're passing ourselves coming and going from gymnastics, preschool, dance class, elementary school, hockey, work, church, work, friends, volunteering and who knows what all else.

But it turns out, it's not just the people in my house who are busy. It's also our loveys.

A couple of weeks ago, Pippi sent her Lulu to work with Daddy. And it turned out that Lulu had a very busy day. Here's what her day looked like:

1. Lulu at work: Lucky for Lulu, she’s in an office that’s been named one of the Business Journal’s “Best Places to Work.” That doesn't means she's not working hard -- but at least she gets some good benefits.

2. Lulu on coffee break: I'm pretty sure she's drinking decaff while reading the Wall Street Journal. She's in public relations, so it's important for her to stay current on the day's headlines.

3. Lulu eating her lunch: Everyone has to eat, even loveys. But there's no time to stop working, so she's eating at her desk.

4. Lulu proofing a press release: Before heading home for the day, she checks to be sure all the i's are dotted and the t's are crossed.

5. Lulu spots a punch-buggy: As part of the family, of course Lulu is also participating in the ongoing punch-buggy game. Being the giver that she is, she credited that one to Pippi's account.

Photo credit: @pwsoneil

A Week in My Life: (Last) Wednesday

Yeah, so blogging every day for "A Week in My Life" with Adventuroo didn't happen. At all. But I took all these pictures each day and I'd hate for them to go to waste. Plus I think it will be interesting to look back in a year or two and see how our routines have changed. So here is our Wednesday from last week. Tomorrow will probably look a lot like this, only without Junius -- he's at Grandparent Camp for his last week of track-out.

Wednesdays, even more than all the other crazy days, are a race.

I should have Pippi at preschool at 8 a.m. so that I could be at the office by 8:30 -- but I never do. After locking the front door, loading us in the car, waiting for Pippi to buckle herself in and remembering to put my smoothie in the cup holder instead of leaving it on top of the car, it's 8:12. My husband has already taken Junius to a friend's house for the day. I drive with my makeup bag in my lap so that I can fix my face at traffic lights.

At 8:18 we're in the preschool parking lot. Pippi actually carries her own backpack (amazing!), meanders through the parking lot, pushes the door opener (every child's favorite part of coming into the school), strolls down to her room and finds her cubby (her teacher moves their names around each day, so that way they learn to recognize their name). I get to my office at 8:30.

Work work work. Blah blah blah. Me at a desk. Computer writing social media. Meetings. At 12:49, I'm back in the car and racing to preschool so I can get Pippi before she heads to afterschool care and falls asleep during quiet time. I curse the radio for the pledge drive chatter. On the way out of school, Pippi leads me through the path her class took that day on their nature walk. I remind myself to treasure the feel of her hand in mine.

At 1:07 we're in the car driving home. Time for Pippi to change into her dance clothes, grab a quick snack and head downtown for Dance Play class at 1:32. This time she claims she can't hook her own seatbelt -- it's always that last bottom piece that won't click. Her smile below is my kankoomommy for helping her.

While Pippi is in class, I sneak over to the Farmers Market to get advance tickets for the NC State Fair. (I cannot emphasize enough the importance of buying ride tickets ahead of time. SO MUCH cheaper.). I only discovered the advance ticket plan this year, but apparently everyone else knew based on the line. I spy a punch-buggy yellow on my way through the parking lot. After Dance Play class is over, we pick up Junius at his friend's house and go home.

While I try to make dinner, Junius takes pictures of Pippi. She's pretending to be the teacher and demonstrating some sort of art project. She insists that I be the student, then takes my crayon-holding hand and corrects what I'm doing wrong.

* * *

At that point, I ran out of the energy required to live the day and document it simultaneously. My husband came home and we gulped down dinner. Then he took Junius to faith formation class (6:30-7:45, which means Junius is out past bedtime which is totally crazy to me) while I took Pippi through her bath-books-bed routine.

On that particular Wednesday night, once the kids were in bed asleep, I sat on the couch with my laptop and wrote my post for Tuesday. I stayed up too late (as usual) and regretted it the next day (as usual).

I'm assuming all of this is normal, right? I mean, the rest of you are running your own version of this marathon, right? And every time I think the slow-down is just around the corner, well... it's not.

More from (Last) Week in My Life:
- Monday
- Tuesday
- Friday

A Week in My Life: Tuesday

Yes, I know it's Wednesday. But Tuesday was very full and there was no time for blogging -- but lots to document. I'm participating in Adventuroo's "A Week in My Life" project. You can see my Monday here.

Tuesday started painfully early for a good cause. If I look a little blurry in that first picture, it's because I was volunteering at my polling station at 6:30 a.m. in the RAIN in the DARK and I wasn't totally awake yet. The kids joined me at 7:30, mostly playing in the car for my last half hour of greeting. (Translation of J's post-it: "Christine is are [our] school board.") And no, no one wanted my little candidate flier.

Once our shift was up, we headed home to play. Also to lay out the newspaper across the counter because it was somehow soaking wet inside the plastic bag.

At 9:00 we got ready for our friend Baby J, who hangs out with us on Tuesday mornings. That means dumping out an entire basket of toys and then confiscating all the tiny things he might try to eat. We also got our They Might Be Giants station playing on Pandora (via TiVo, which I LOVE). You can see here that we all love Baby J very much. He loves us too, although sometimes I think he'd like a little more personal space.

At 11:00, we loaded up Baby J and took Pippi to her gymnastics class. Baby J took a nap while Junius played games on my iPhone.

After we returned Baby J to his parents, we loaded back into the car with lunch and headed to Daddy's office for flu shots. Junius, apparently exhausted from the morning, gave out along the way. Pippi managed to keep herself awake by singing the entire time.

Junius and I were very brave for our shots (Pippi already got hers at the pediatrician). Then we argued over who would get to push the buttons in the elevator.

On the ride home, we rocked out to one of our most favorite CDs: the aptly-titled Songs Your Mom Will Like by Big Bang Boom. That's Pippi beatboxing and playing the air trumpet on track 14. Buy it now and thank me later.

After a little rest time (read: 30 minutes of TV) at home, we loaded back into the car (are you noticing a theme here?) for some play time at our friends' house. Pippi showed us how she can buckle her own seat belt (which can take up to 5 minutes, depending on the amount of whining involved). We admired our friends' fabulous Halloween decorations, debated the scientific names of toy dinosaurs and generally had a whirlwind of fun.

At 6:00, we picked up Daddy and went out for dinner at a local restaurant that was having a fundraising night for our arts school. Junius impressed his friends by reading all the signs on the way in (yes, first-graders are that cool). The kids played with wikistiks while we waited for our food (smart restaurant), then Pippi cleaned her plate and part of Junius' too. My girl loves some pasta. I had the yummiest bleu cheese mac-n-cheese with bacon -- comfort food on a rainy night.

Back at home, we filled milk cups (I don't know why, but that blue cup is THE ONLY WAY Junius will drink milk and he MUST have it at bedtime every night) and went upstairs for bed. Junius brushed his teeth and protested all the photography. I spray-treated Pippi's shirt (why oh why do I ever buy white shirts for her?) and pondered the need for gender-specific children's toothpaste. Then Daddy showed the kids pictures from his day touring cool Raleigh locations like the science museum and the RBC Center.

It was my turn to read to Pippi. She picked out "The Shy Little Girl," a book I somehow still have from my childhood. I love how much she loves the book, even though parts of it are really dated. The trick to getting Pippi to sleep is to get her to be still -- see how she fidgets with her hands to stay awake?

Finally at 8:00, with both kids asleep, my political junkie husband and I settled in on the couch for election returns. With two laptops, an iPad, an iPhone and the television between us, we stalked the results, read tweets aloud, flipped news channels and cheered for the victory. Who says you can't have champagne on a Tuesday?

And so my day ended where it began -- worn out, but happy to support a great candidate.
.

A Week in My Life: Monday

This week I'm participating in Adventuroo's "A Week in My Life" project. In case you wondered what it looks like where I am. Apologies in advance if you're exhausted by Wednesday.

Junius is tracked out this week, so he got to hang out with me at work this morning. Thankfully, he had Daddy's iPad and could watch Toy Story 3 while he ate lunch. He pronounced my office "boring." He's absolutely probably right.

But at least I made a lot of progress on my to-do list today. Turns out that having Junius at my desk is a lot less distracting than having to go to meetings, which were cancelled today.

Even though he got to have pumpkin bread and play with the tape dispenser, Junius was still happy when it was time to leave.

We picked up campaign materials on the way home (the kids and I are volunteering for Christine Kushner at the polls tomorrow!), then went to preschool to get Pippi.

 This is my view in the rearview mirror.

Not sure I'll ever understand why climbing out of the car and carrying your own stuff into the house is so hard. But apparently it is. So. Very. Hard.

Junius's first task after arriving home? Testing out the paper/straw boat he made in my office to see if it would float. Turns out that construction paper? Not so sea-worthy.

Meanwhile, Pippi took control of the iPhone, where she recently discovered the iPod button. She likes to listen to the first 15 seconds of every song. Yes, that's Ben Folds Five. Thankfully it's not one of the songs with the F-bomb.

Here's the bane of my existence. A full dishwasher, waiting to be unloaded. Sort of like Pippi getting out of the car, I don't know why this pains me so. But it does.

While I was unloading said dishwasher, the kids started to get silly. It always begins innocently enough...

...then turns into a wrestling, giggling heap, which is all good and fun until...

...somebody gets poked in the eye...

 ...and (unrelated to the eye wound) someone else lands in time-out.

We ultimately all recovered and were grateful for some playtime outside with our friends across the street. Notice that Junius is travelling sans-training wheels as of yesterday. (Also, if you are a mom with a son, you must take a minute to read my friend's latest post.)

We closed out the day with one of the kids' favorite meals. That is, anything served on the floor in front of the television. Always swore I wouldn't let my kids watch TV during dinner. And yet, here we are. At least we were watching Sesame Street and talking science terms with Grover 2.0.

Good night, y'all. It's been a full day.

P.S. In case you missed the good news on Facebook or Twitter Friday, I got the all clear at the dermatologist! I'm free for another six months. Phew.
.