Pippi was generally a better sleeper than her brother was as a baby -- although truthfully that’s a pretty low bar. But where Junius tried to kill us quickly through insanely intense sleep deprivation during his first year, his sister has taken the slow-torture approach and is trying to bring about my demise in a more methodical, diabolical fashion.
She continues -- even at age five-and-three-quarters -- to wake up during the night (sometimes more than once) and require attention. Sometimes she calls from her bed, with a sing-song "Moooooooooooooo-mmyyyyyyyyyyyyyy." Then there’s a 15-second pause, followed by the same pitch of Moooooooooooooo-mmyyyyyyyyyyyyyy," (almost never "Daaaaaaaaa-ddyyyyyyyy") which continues steadily until I go into her room. Other times she appears at the edge of the bed, as if by magic, her round face and hot breath an inch from mine -- which still scares the crap out of me when I realize she’s there. Frequently she wakes up around 5:00, which gives her plenty of time to go back to sleep while robbing me of my last 30 minutes before I have to get up for boot camp.
I am basically rude and not at all sympathetic to her when this happens. But I walk her back to her bed, tuck her in and tell her I love her -- because I just. want. to go. back. to sleep.
It seemed we had finally
Well, actually, I have a few…
27 Reasons That May or May Not Explain Why My Daughter Wakes Up During the Night
- She is lonely.
- She needs to pee.
- She needs to pee and wants to use my bathroom instead of hers.
- She needed to pee and just wanted to tell me that she already went. All by herself.
- She peed and now she wants someone to tuck her in.
- She wants someone to lie down with her.
- She wants someone to lie down with her who is a human and not one of her “friends” that is a stuffed animal.
- Her bed is too crowded.
- She just wants some company.
- She wants to know if it’s time to get up.
- She wants to know how much longer until morning.
- Her legs itch.
- He back itches.
- She can’t find Shirley (the Sheep, pictured above).
- She wants to know if she has school tomorrow.
- Or the next day?
- She just remembered a funny story about what happened at school yesterday and needs to tell me about it right now.
- She had a bad dream.
- She had a silly dream. And needs to tell me about it right now.
- She wonders how many days it is until her birthday and how many friends she can invite to her party and can it please be a sleep-over?
- Her room is too dark.
- Her nightlight is too bright.
- There were these really awesome Hello Kitty socks in the dollar bin at Target and she wants to know if we could go buy them in the morning.
- Her closet doors are open.
- She thought her brother was up.
- She wants to know if she can play Minecraft on Daddy’s iPad.
- She needs a tissue. And she may or may not have a nosebleed.